Everybody who tried to learn a language with language exchange partners knows the possible problems.
- I have no idea what should I say!
- I’m embarrassed because his/her level is much higher
- Or on a too low level
- I can’t somehow find a consistent partner
- The 50% that we practice my first language is waste of time and boring
Does that mean I dont recommend learning with Language Exchange?
Absolutely not! It is a terrific tool and everybody should always use it. And with the focus on small details, especially guys who had bad experiences in the past, get gigantic value out of it.
The main problem with random language buddies is that the only reason two people speak with each other is that the other possesses mastery skills in the other’s desired target language.
Of course, can’t deny that this the core essential connection. But it should NOT be the only one. Because if it is, then I understand totally why people having “no idea what to say”, or being afraid about the partners level and all the other things from the list above.
Therefore it is logical that this language buddy we choose should NOT only be connected with the sole trait that was just mentioned.
In fact, it should only be the fundament of this language relation ship.
“People don’t do what they want the most, but the thing, they fear the least!”Prof. Dr. Jack Nasher, Management Psychologist
Creating a comfortzone
In order to take that fear from you, and your language partner, a friendly environment needs to be created.
Doing so by creating a comfort zone. A place/situation people are feeling safe and accepted. That applies to anybody.
Ask yourself. why your friends, the ones you hang in your spare time, are your friends? Why do you like to be with them?
Because they give you a good feeling. And good feeling builds up that comfort zone.
Good feelings are created when you discuss the football match of your favorite team that was playing last evening with another fan. Or about the same music genre you love. About your religion, politics, hobbies… you name it. Most definitely you speak most about what you have in common with that specific friend.
Language exchange buddy traits
Yes, you guessed it. The traits of a language buddy should be the same as the ones of a friend. Because similarities make the whole thing extremely interesting!
Following you find some advantages out of it:
- You get a new friend, your social circle grows
- Conversations about mutual interests increase the dopamine level
- That leads you to focus on the fun stuff and get language progress sideways! Effortless motivation for free!
- You never have the problem of “I don’t know what to say?” again
- This relationship is interesting, so a consistent language buddy is guaranteed
- The sympathy to this person makes you love to support him/her and 50% of the time will not feel “wasted” and “exhausting” anymore
- In togetherness, humans are stronger and support each other in dark hours, you are in a winning team!
But WHERE & HOW THE #ELL CAN I FIND SUCH ONE?
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